Who do I want to be…

At present, this is day 23 of Quarantine for most of us. Still, there is a long way to go. I’m waiting for my homemade bread to toast so I can toss some cinnamon on it. (Hold the sugar, thank you!) So while I am waiting, thoughts of “when this whole Shelter in Place/Quarantine is all said and done, what memories do I want to look back on? That I binge watched “Private Practice” on Netflix? That I finally read all those books I towering on my nightstand like a medieval fortress?”

Well, kinda. BUT, I also want to look back and say “I was the kind of person who played games with my family and got creative with them.” And, “we prayed together as a family. I encouraged them to pray for others.” Above all, I want to say “I met someone’s needs. I encouraged someone. I prayed for our country, world, family, friends…” I want to know that I did my part by staying at home. Or if I did have to run out (for toilet paper and eggs) that I wore my mask. Above all else, I want to remember the times I prayed silently, on my knees; read the scriptures for hope and encouragement; praised God for who HE is; stood firm in the knowledge that He is still on His throne; rejoiced in the reality that more people are seeing God’s love through random acts of kindness.


Halfway through

Everyone has been counting down to Christmas since July, basically. And now we are halfway through November.

So, albeit Nov 16, it seems like Christmas is in full swing. And Thanksgiving is next week looking like “what am I? Chopped liver?” Well for my family, this year is THE YEAR for Thanksgiving. 26 is the number gathering around my mom’s table this year. Why? Because she houses my grandfather. The Patriarch of our clan.

And although it’s been one of the hardest years of my existence on this planet, it seems fitting to have the biggest Thanksgiving I’ve seen in a long while. See, this is what matters: Family; People. Recognizing all the wonderful things God has given me in my life. And it starts with the 26 people gathering around the table next week.

Photo by Pro Church Media on Unsplash

What I learned from Yesterday – Day 1

As I ate pizza and watched Thor: Ragnarok with my family a few family date nights ago, my mind drifted to the FB messenger conversation I had earlier that day with an old friend. One whom I have not really had contact with for several years.  What had she been up to for the past 10? For starters, living in another country with her family. No doubt doing something missions minded and “Jesus like”.

My friend is a sweet, kind, caring, Jesus loving person. One whom I would compare myself to and say  “wow, I am NOT like her. She really loves God and does things for him and I struggle in that area.” (She’d probably laugh if she read this.) I actually have another friend whose life almost parallels hers. Same heart and missions mindset. My comparison of myself and this particular friend is the same. “Wow, I am NOT like her. She really loves God and does things for him and I struggle in that area.”

And in that next bite of pizza, I thought about how, first of all, I didn’t want to be eating that slice of pizza (actually there were 2 on my plate). Honestly, I really enjoy more of a Paleo/Whole 30 eating style. To me, pizza is the white flag of surrender. Or rather, it’s me “throwing in the towel.” It means I’ve given up on caring what goes in my body and how it will affect me. It means I don’t believe I have any fight left me for changing my eating habits. (I know what you’re thinking – “a little dramatic, don’t you think?”)

Stay with me here.

So although I was enjoying family date night, I started to feel a little depressed.  I have settled in life for pizza- comfort food. And comparing myself to the life of those 2 particular friends made me think “what else have I  settled for in the name of comfort?” Settled for out of fear. Fear of engaging with life – my life- to the fullest. Now, do NOT get me wrong. If you want to eat pizza and watch Thor (it was actually kinda funny) then go ahead. No judgment here.

What I learned from yesterday was that I do want to pursue healthy eating. I don’t want to feel like I’ve let myself down or thrown in the towel of life. And not just in eating, but what challenge has God called me to that I have turned away from out of fear? Fear of giving myself to others because then I wouldn’t have time to myself? Fear of being great in an area and “shining” for God because then I would have to get up the next day and be great again? (I hear another blog post forming in my head).

I thought “what if I was made for more?” What if I had something to offer the world like my missionary minded friends? My journey looks different from theirs because I am different. I get that. But the take away here is I want to make this life count. I only get one shot at this life. And my life- what I do with it- impacts my children and how they live theirs. And that is a lot of pressure when you think about it! But if I am holding on to Jesus and looking to Him for direction, I am gonna be ok. I can do this. Life is about the journey. It’s about failing and falling and getting back up. It’s about learning from yesterday. The good and the bad from it. It’s also about “nailed it” outcomes and “high fiving” others.

So each morning, one of my first thoughts is to pray and ask God for his guidance on the day. And often I feel in my spirit “You got this” because I know that if the day belongs to God- if I surrender my day to Him and trust Him for that day- then with Him all things are possible. So yes, let hope rise up in me today because “I got this!”

And that is what I learned from yesterday.

Finally at the starting gate

Finally, I am here at the starting gate of 2018. Yes, I know it’s halfway through January, but I feel that I am finally getting some traction to starting the year well. See, back in November/December of 2017, I did start looking into which planner I wanted. I felt alive! Ahead of the game even. I picked out the Panda Planner Weekly 1-Yr and was ready to order but I didn’t at that time because someone (who shall remain anonymous) asked me to send him the link so he could get it for me for Christmas. (How sweet!)

Honestly, I don’t want to seem like I am throwing him under the bus here. I am so appreciative of him and his wanting to get this for me. However, the bottom line is by the time he went to order my planner it was “Sold Out.” GASP! Overall this really is ok. I just printed off a few pdf sheets Panda Planner sent me and pasted them into pages of my current Passion Planner. Problem Solved! Why am I telling you all this? Because I want you to know that I am an extremely patient and forgiving person. HA HA HA! Totally kidding. What I mean to say is that I love planning. It makes me feel that I have control. And I have come to grips over the past few years that I am a control freak (right, honey?)

Another reason I share this is that I am learning that I can print off pdf versions of my fave planners allowing me to craft my own very special and perfect planner. Thus sending me to my happy place (enter “Nerd Zone” here).

Life Skills 101.

Also, I share about being at the starting gate because I had my kids pick out their planners to purchase. We went to the craft store and bought stickers (all on Sale!) and started our planning class the next day! Yep, this is a class we are having in our Homeschool semester. It’s part of Life Skills 101. It is helping them to see what needs to be done in their day and learn how to plan the fun things they want to do along with the school things they have to do.

It also teaches them how to make goals and set them. How to take steps towards accomplishing them. And who doesn’t love to “sticker” things up! So money well spent to teach a life lesson on how to “live the life you love and love the life you live.”

In the planning zone: it makes me happy

My happy times look like this

  • A rainy day (cloudy, drizzly, pouring, you get the idea).

Generally, with this rainy day, I’d love to be curled up on the sofa by the window, with a book and beverage (coffee, wine, whatever– the time of day may or may not matter because I’m not driving anywhere in this rain. Are you crazy?!)

  • Or, my happy looks like this (and yes, I mean for happy to serve as a noun in this sentence): my planner, pencil, colored pencils, and stickers.

For example, today’s happy blog comes from my desire to be intentional about my life. I’ve been doing some research on how to make sure I am staying on track with homeschooling (because I do have a fear that I will stupid my kids– and yes, I did that on purpose… to enlist a “shock face” from you. No, I am not serious about using “stupid” as a verb).

I found a blogger who is a homeschool mom of 8 and she has joyous lessons to share her experiences with her family. That’s the name of her blog, Joyous Lessons. Love it!

So I use my love of lists and a blank page in my planner. I titled it “Things I like that others do” and I started to jot down ideas people have or systems they have in place. I wrote down the idea. And broke it down into steps or things I need. For example, one of the examples that Joyous Lessons shares is that of a Morning Basket – “all the work done together as a family.” I love this idea. See, she likes nature drawing and journaling and so I wrote that down because that sounds like something my family would enjoy, and I listed ways to make this happen. (As creatively demonstrated below).  I added Binoculars for birdwatching, journal and pencils to document/draw, etc. All I need to add now is snacks and water bottles. And wallah! Let the Happy Begin!


Overwhelmed and loving it!

At times, I almost can’t take it. An overwhelmed feeling that something bigger than myself is about to happen to me and I can’t even take it.  Such great anticipation. My facial expressions shift from puzzlement to excitement to fear and then circles back. What I am talking about is the season of life I am in. For example, we are homeschooling for the first time, so with that, comes lots of planning. And reading. And internet searching, printing, highlighting and hole punching. Two kids in two different grade levels for a homeschooling newbie often enlists an initial response of deer-in-headlights. Fear of “messing up my kids and making them stupid” rolls across my head like digital message boards. Continue reading “Overwhelmed and loving it!”

Plan your work and work your plan and all is well with your soul

Planning. It’s my new passion. And I have a Passion Planner to prove it! You know the old saying “plan your work and work your plan”? It totally swims around my head on a daily basis. My happy place is my planner along side my pens, highlighters and of course, my journal. First of all, that is where the magic happens. From my head to the paper. If it stays in my head, it gets forgotten. Lost. Continue reading “Plan your work and work your plan and all is well with your soul”

Here is me … Not so tech savvy



HA! I did it! The first picture is what happens when you drag a photo from messages. And then I figured it out. But still. This is me… not so tech savvy.

My girl Rylynn and I at our church Christmas party. It was a lot of work to set up the party… but this one was probably my favorite one yet.

So today I am just chillin’. Since I was supposed to have an wellness appt today and it got rescheduled, I am staying in my jammies and listening to Christmas music and recovering from a past two weeks of go go go!

I’m looking forward to actually doing nothing today. Making a point to NOT DO ANY WORK today (well, no “job” work that is). But I am going to make a list of what I need to do today to finalize our own Christmas decor. That’s all for today. Ho Ho Ho!



Better than me

Pity party. Party of 1.

Today is my designated writing day. It’s on my calendar. The one I have been trying to use to help me organize my life and enjoy it even.

Going into the day, I had a good feeling about it. Aside from the start of the day that wasn’t part of the normal routine. Taking the kids to CFA because daddy had to go into work early so he couldn’t take them to All Pro Dads this morning at school. Which I could have gone to— mom’s are not discouraged from going— it’s just that the kids opted for going to CFA for chicken mini’s vs. All Pro Dad’s for biscuits.

When I got back home, I had this feeling of dread. So I just prayed. Continue reading “Better than me”