When your boy says “I just want to be with you”

It’s that time of day when the kids have earned phone time and I start to exercise. But I don’t get started on that just yet because I decide I need to have my quiet time first. So I spend a little time there with time to spare for 20 minutes exercise. But hark, what is that I hear in the doorway? Sounds of a game. I look up to see my 8 year old who has been home with me not feeling well today. He is gazing at the phone and his thumbs are busy moving around the screen. Charger in hand. His phone is about to die. I ask if he is ok. “yes.” I ask him if he needs something or does he just want to be with me. “I just want to be with you.”  My soul sings 🙂 Heart full 🙂

So I get my computer and sit back down. Looking through my journal and the things I have been circling in prayer. It’s been about a year for this one particular prayer request. I have a feeling that I am asking for discernment regarding this. I feel as if the answer to the prayer has already been given, I just need to walk through it. But I am afraid. Why can’t I just do it? Partly because I feel guilty – like I should be able to get everything I need done in the time frame I have. (ok, so the prayer request has to do with time). Part of me realizes I need more conversation/prayer time with my husband. I believe that is part of God’s plan. Alas, I am sitting here. Looking up from time to time to just stare at my son. And smile. He is happily playing. Timer will probably go off any second. He would be satisfied (well, he will still ask for more time, maybe) with what he has done. But I would not have accomplished what I set out. But will be happy I changed it to meet his need. A need to be in close proximity with me.

Jesus, I love you. I want to honor you with my words and resources. Thank you for teaching me what is really important.

My family. Lord, teach me what to do with things that come my way. If things are not lining up with my goal of nourishing my family, then I need not worry about whether to fit them in my schedule.

 

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